I heard this gif.

It went “Weeeeeooooo<leafy splash>” over and over again.

EDIT: wait. There’s actual sound. And it’s awesome.

Pretty sure Stormy coulda told you that way before Vance the Couchfucker.

“We don’t want to ride on a Boeing. We’ll take the next ride.”

“It’s the space x.”

“You mean the space NEXT? Isn’t there the Dream Chaser? We like that one.”

And sometimes, you just want to annoy the person who’s not a cuddler.

Isssokay. We still like you.

Trump has all the STDs. He caught the last one after fucking Vance’s couch.

I remember this thing in NPR about the kind of grudges male hippos make.

The story was about a tour guide that would take people down the Nile (iirc,) and there was this one particular hippo that would come out and be a dick every time he was on the water.

Well, this guy moves away for whatever reason. The hippo goes away, stops bothering people.

Then the dude came back, like years later, doing guided tours again. Asshole hippo is on the water and tries to kill him again. Like. Flips the boat then drags the dude under. I forget if the hippo let him go or got shot or whatever, but yeah.

“A little higher please. I said hig-aahhhhhthatsssthessssspot”

alternatively, if they had better prospects than their kids being sent to die in useless meat grinders.

data brokerage is a multi-billion dollar industry with entire armies of lobyists from Google, Apple, Tesla (probably) and who knows who else.

just in case you were wondering why it’s not already done.

Yeah. That’s terrifying.

I’m gonna need a few snakes trained to jump-glide onto people for Halloween. Preferably snakes that tolerate kids.

Maybe a trained anaconda. For Joey.

Saying the universe was created, implies a creator.

I assume it was just something that happened.

So, y’all remember that twitter profile “Shit My Dad Says”?

One of them was “when people start talking about sick size, don’t whip out a ruler; keep your mouth shut, stuff your crotch and keep your pants on.”

(Or something like that.)

The more they insist that their nukes … whelp. The more we think we should let them whip one out.

Gotta keep the American dream alive.

Give people hope.

People with hope don’t revolt because they still have something to lose.

Most ag business, the people working the fields don’t own the land, the corporations do. Most of America’s farmland is owned by corporations and is worked on by employees being paid peanuts. (Frequently, undocumented immigrants whose status is being used to keep them from complaining about the illegally low wages.)

I don’t need to address anything.

You don’t need to either. That’s your choice.

But once again- you do seem to want to persuade people…. And I’m trying to help you do that. You do you, but you’re not going to get very far.

They’re being sued my 2 millionaire estates, a liability waiver is not enough, and I’m guessing Nargeolet (the explorer,) wasn’t exactly broke.

Usually liability waivers only apply to “reasonable “ risks that are known to both parties. “We might implode because we cheated out and aren’t doing the inspections and were using materials basic material science says we shouldn’t,” likely isn’t covered- it’s reasonable to assume they’re operating a safe sub when it blatantly wasn’t.

Sorry, my joke didn’t quite land- “couchfucker” stuck and he “didn’t even fuck a coach one time.”

(He does protest a bit much though. Maybe he tried it after it came out, or something.)

You know. You’re missing the point?

Your methods do not work. You know that. You can see the results.

All people are going to remember from your interactions is that you were a preachy jerk.

And it’s yet another interaction that reinforces the image that all vegans are preachy jerks- even if it is far from the truth.

You are literally hurting your cause.

had me giggling in the first half, since I knew where it was going. Had me snorting by the end.

Grand Old Pricks